What was the first property/media you read fanfiction online for?  🌈

My brother, reading out loud: Ianthe Tridentasaurus

Me: Yeah that’s her name you’re right

TV show: This is a TV show called Shits&Farts. It is about shits, & farts. The main characters are two men named Shit, & Fart. They tell shit & fart jokes to each other for the whole twenty-minute runtime.

at least one person you follow on tumblr, instantly: omfg im WITHERING from last nights ep….. the dynamic between shit & fart is so fucking  tense and erotic……im still fucking sobbing i hate my sweet babies….. why do they treat each other like this im fucking BATHING IN ACID….. its so good…….. im EMBALMING MYSELF and then DESECRATING MY OWN CORPSE…..

LESS movies about the lgbtq experience MORE movies about people who just happen to be lgbtq. is it really that hard to understand

Melanie Martinez wishes she was Grimes. Grimes wishes she was Bjork. Bjork wishes she was 2 inches tall so she could go inside the computer and have a big adventure

Alana bloom v Wendy Carr is really interesting as a watcher of the jdcu. despite filing the exact same role and being the same character prima facie, they are complete foils. Alana is what one might call spunky. she cares deeply about her coworkers and her patients. her character is in proximal conversation with the y2k rom com's best friend archetype. Wendy, on the other hand, is a frigid perpetrator of wlw mlm hostility. there has never been a person on earth she has liked enough to spend more than five minutes in a room with much less her coworkers. she is so profoundly bored by the thought of having patients that she exclusively teaches and reserches. if their positions were reversed I think that

1. Alana bloom would be a total buzzkill. she would say she was there for someone and genuinely mean it without getting distracted by a hot bartender. she would give everyone stern talking tos about being nice to each other.

2. if Wendy Carr was in Alana bloom's position, she would simply make will graham cry. a benefit of this is that it would be really funny

So, sifting through The Books again for deep lore meant I, of course, got sidetracked so I want to mention something. I've heard some people (citations are for losers) warn others that HtN isn't as funny as GtN. I suppose I concede, but I also just lost my shit reading the passage about John trying to explain how the River works to the baby Lyctors. With Mercy growing more and more irritated at the fact that John JUST WONT USE A RIVER METAPHOR ITS RIGHT THERE as it gets more obtuse until he's talking about Cassiopeia's explanation ("Oh, no, the lava," said Mercy) and the unkillable man-eating magma fish. I know it's a long and important exposition sequence, but it's also fucking hilarious how it builds up.

And also one scene that only hit me a few pages after I read it was the part where Cytherea is chasing Harrow. She runs to her room, slams the door, puts up all the fancy blood wards, then props up a chair under the door handle for good measure.

Then Cyth completely ignores the wards and is thwarted by the chair jamming the handle. Seriously, such a tense scene and you're like, phew! Then, wait a fucking minute... No. This is rediculous. And it is. It's so silly, a word I would hesitate to describe most of the book and yet here we are.

I asked my (23M, human) orc gf (25F, orc) to stop deadlifting my family members when she comes over for the holidays because it makes me looks small and weak, and now she and the rest of her clan keep forcing me to run laps and lift whole roasted hogs when I visit for orc holidays. AITA?